Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Happy Birthday Avery

Avery,



Happy Birthday sweetie. I can't believe that it has been two years. I miss you just as much today as I did the day you left us. I can still almost feel your tiny little body in my arms. I wish so badly that I didn't have to let you go but I will always be grateful to be your mom. Although the feelings are still so fresh, it seems like forever since we said goodbye and an eternity until we will see each other again.

I still think of you every day and I can't help but wonder what our lives would be like if you were still here. I can only imagine how incredibly adorable you would be and how in love with you your daddy and I would be. Our lives are changed forever because of you but I still long for the life we would have had with you.

When I say my prayers at night I still thank my Heavenly Father for sending you to me and I pray that I can be a person that you would be proud to call mommy. I long for the day when I will hear you call me mommy and let me hold you in my arms again.

I hope that you can hear me when I tell you that I love you and I miss you. I hope that you know how much you mean to me and how my life will never be the same. You are my first born, my little girl and you always will be.

My heart hurts everyday that passes without you here. I know that someday it will not be that way, and that it will get better, but I will never forget you and I will never stop loving you. Every year on this day we will do something to honor your beautiful memory and I know that you will be with us while we do. We miss you so much sweetie. You are the most beautiful, wonderful thing that has ever happened to us and we will never regret our decision to do whatever it took to have you.

I promise that when your brother(s) and/or sister(s) join our family, we will make sure that they know all about you and I know that they will love you as much as we do. If you are with them now, please tell them that we are ready for them.

I love you Avery and I miss you so much it hurts. You are my pride and joy, and my reason for being on this earth. I look forward to the day I will hold you again, and until then sweet baby girl, you will be in my thoughts and in my heart.

Love you always,
Your mommy.

11 comments:

The Schexnayders said...

Im thinking of you today Candi and Im remembering your beautiful baby girl. We love you so much and pray that you may be comforted today.

Kara said...

Remembering Avery with you today. She is so lucky to have you as a Mommy. ((hugs))

Amy Jo said...

Sending warm thoughts your way today as you reflect on your time spent with Avery here on earth. She is truly a gift.

Jessica said...

Sending hugs and prayers for peace today. Thinking of your sweet baby girl today. *hugs*

Melissa Swartley said...

We are thinking of you today and sending our prayers and hugs! I came across your blog through Tonya's. You have one beautiful little angel in heaven!

TREVOR AND MINDY SAVAGE said...

Candi, just wanted you to know I was thinking of you today. You are such a sweet mom.

Natalie.Rob.Branson said...

Happy Birthday Avery! What a beautifully written letter to your angel. You are a wonderful mother and Avery is blessed to be pasrt of such an amazing family...so full of love. Our thoughts and prayers are with you as you long to hold your little one close. We love you.

Leslie said...

Happy Birthday Avery. I hope you find a wonderful way to celebrate your daughter today! I miss you.

Jennifer said...

Remembering Avery especially today on her birthday and keeping you in my prayers.

Henrie Fam said...

Thinking of Avery and wishing her a happy birthday. I pray that you have had a day of peace and felt Avery near!

Love you

Miche said...

Happy Birthday Avery!