Tuesday, February 22, 2011

30 Weeks!

How far along: 30 Weeks!  Only 10 more to go!

Size of baby: Your belly’s increasing size is a definite clue that your baby is getting bigger every day, weighing in at over three pounds now (he’ll be packing on the weight at a rate of half a pound per week for the next seven weeks). Also growing daily is his brain, which is actually starting to look like the real thing with those characteristic grooves and wrinkles. And now that your little genius can regulate his own body temperature and turn up the heat, he'll start shedding lanugo, the downy body hair that's been keeping him warm up until now.  (However, if he's anything like me, he'll be born hairy and stay that way most of his life!!  My little monkey indeed!)

Weight gain: 22 pounds.

Maternity clothes: Mostly. I can still get away with a few of my regular shirts!

Gender: BOY!!

Movement: Counting movements now and although he does move enough every day, some days it's less than others and I start to freak out. I need to relax but at this point in my pregnancy I have accepted that relaxing is just not possible!

Sleep: Sleep is definitely more difficult, but it's not from a lack of trying. I am tired enough to sleep 10-12 hours a night but am lucky to get in 5 or 6.  Guess I had better get used to it!

Symptoms: Back pain, feet and hands swelling, heartburn, headaches, braxton hicks, occasional cramping, gas, constipation, itchy skin... the list goes on and on but to be honest... I LOVE IT!!

Cravings: Heads or Tails Oreos... if you haven't tried them you need to!!  I try not to have them every day but they are so tempting...with a cold glass of milk!

Best moment this week: My sister came over this weekend and organized Sawyer's room.  We do have to talk Skeet into moving the dresser (for the 3rd time... yes he is frustrated with me) and then she will come over and help me put up the decorations on the walls.  I will post pictures of the finished product when it is done.  SO CUTE!  It feels nice to have it almost done though... one less thing to worry about!

What I am looking forward to: Nothing big this week.. just watching my belly grow and feeling him move around like he's practicing kickboxing or something like that!  He has been moving like crazy the last few days and I am trying to cherish every second cause I know that I will miss that feeling, even when I am holding him in my arms!

Sunday, February 20, 2011

Baby Shower!

Last weekend my sister, mom and my friends Ashlee and Kate, threw me an amazing baby shower!  I know that I was only going to have one and I couldn't have imagined anything more perfect!  My sister did a monkey theme in brown and green.  Ash and Kate came up with the awesome idea of doing chocolate fountains with tons of yummy stuff to dip!  I LOVE chocolate fondue so I was pretty excited about the food.  The decorations were so dang cute and after all the presents were opened, a few of my friends and family stayed and made scrapbook pages for Sawyer's baby book.  They turned out so cute and I can't wait to have pictures of my little monkey to fill them up!
  Only a small portion of the people invited were able to make it but I think it was so much fun!  (Although we did miss everyone that couldn't make it)  I felt so blessed to have such great friends come and support me and Sawyer.  We were definitely spoiled too... I finally feel like we have just about everything we need. 
I seriously cannot thank everyone enough for the gifts.  To my sister, mom, Ash and Kate, you guys are the best!!  I will forever be grateful to you for all you did and hope you know how much I love you!! 
(There were a lot more pictures of me opening presents but my face has gotten fat and I couldn't stand to put them on here!)

Sawyer's room is so full!! I don't know where to put everything! Thanks everybody!

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

29 Weeks

How far along:   29 Weeks!

Size of baby: At 29 weeks pregnant, your baby is almost 17 inches tall now (nearly as tall as he  will be at birth), and close to three pounds (a weight that will likely more than double — and may even come close to tripling — by delivery time). His wrinkled skin is smoothing out as more fat is deposited under the skin surface. This fat, called white fat, is different from the earlier brown fat that your developing fetus accumulated. Brown fat is necessary for body temperature regulation while white fat (the fat you have, Mom) actually serves as an energy source.  ** Sawyer is now much longer, and slightly heavier than Avery was at birth.  So I am guessing that my tummy right now, is about the size it was when I went into labor with her, maybe bigger.  I just can't believe it.**

Weight gain: 20 pounds.

Maternity clothes: Mostly. I can still get away with a few of my regular shirts!

Gender: BOY!!

Movement: Counting movements now and although he does move enough every day, some days it's less than others and I start to freak out.  I need to relax but at this point in my pregnancy I have accepted that relaxing is just not possible!

Sleep: I sleep okay but I wake up feeling like I took a beating... my whole body hurts! The pregnancy pillow has helped some but it took me a while to figure out how to maneuver around it.  Skeet appreciates the pillow cause he's got more room in bed now!

Symptoms: Back pain, feet and hands swelling, heartburn, headaches, braxton hicks, occasional cramping, gas, constipation, itchy skin... the list goes on and on but to be honest... I LOVE IT!!

Cravings: For a while now I have been craving Chinese food.  Skeet doesn't like it much but last night for Valentines I didn't want to go out but I didn't want to cook so he got me some Panda Express... it was delicious!

Best moment this week: My baby shower... it was amazing!  Better than I could have ever imagined!  As soon as I get pictures from my sister I will do a post all about it! Let me just say I have the best friends and family in the world!!

What I am looking forward to: Getting Sawyer's nursery put together and ready for him to use.  We have almost everything we need now and I just need to get it all organized and put away!  I know it's still early but I don't want to chance it not being ready, if he comes early or if I end up on bedrest (which I am not planning on either... just so you know).

Monday, February 14, 2011

My Valentine (Warning... Mushy Content)

Last night, while I was lying in bed, I started thinking back to Skeet and my first Valentine's Day together. We had just met a couple of months before and hadn't seen each other in 6 weeks. Our relationship at that point had consisted of a few dates at first and then hours worth of phone calls every day because I had gone back to Texas, where I was living at the time, and he was in Utah. After our 2nd date I knew I was going to marry him so those 6 weeks without him was pretty much torture. I'm not sure he felt the same way but he seemed to want to be with me just as much. Our first "I love you" was even over the phone.

After we had met, I decided to move back home to Utah. We made plans for Skeet to fly to Texas and make the drive back to Utah with me. This just happened to fall right around Valentine's Day so we were able to spend our first Valentine's Day together in Dallas. I remember being so nervous, anxious, and excited to see him when I was waiting for him at the airport. When I finally saw him I just ran into his arms and I remember it was the best feeling ever! I took him out and showed him the city I had grown to love, and on Valentine's Day we spent the entire day together just enjoying each other and the fact that we were finally together again. It is one of my favorite memories because I knew that I was going home with him and we didn't have to spend that much time apart ever again. (Little did I know, 4 months after we were married, he would leave me for 2 months to go to a training in New Mexico)

Our first picture.  This was in Dallas, check out his white hair!!

Since then, we have spent as much time as we possibly can together. With his job, he is gone a lot and I miss him every time he leaves. I have to say that I think our time apart makes us appreciate each other so much more and we don't let the small stuff get to us... because it's just not worth it. I am more in love with him today than I ever thought possible and I am so thankful that he chose me to be his wife.

I can't imagine a better husband and father. He has been my rock, my best friend... my everything. Sometimes when I look at him I am just so amazed that this man loves me and that he is mine forever! I know I don't deserve him but I hope that he never figures that out!!

I love you Skeeter! Happy Valentine's Day!
Engagement photo

First dance

I love this picture... he looks so sexy!

Friday, February 11, 2011

Quick Update

It's been a rough week. I have had quite a lot of pain this week and if I knew it was all normal pain I could deal with it.  But it didn't feel normal and so I was a little bit on edge.  I did go to L&D on Tuesday night and didn't have one contraction the entire time I was hooked up to the monitors, but as soon as I stood up... they came right back!  I feel okay if I am sitting or lying down so I have been trying to do that as much as possible.  I was really looking forward to seeing Dr. S yesterday cause I was hoping he could shed some light on what was going on.  Unfortunately all he could tell me was that I needed to take it easy and keep doing what I am doing.  Which is practically nothing.  I mean other than doing my weekly injections of progesterone and taking the nifedipine when I feel like I need it.  He did do an ultrasound this week and my cervix is measuring about the same, 2.6 cm.  On the ultrasound it did look like my cervix had started to dilate a little bit, but when he checked me it wasn't enough to cause concern.  I am still high, closed and posterior (whatever that means).  I will go back next week to see him again. 

I still can't believe that we are in the 3rd trimester!  Not only that, but I am having a baby shower tomorrow!  It is just so unreal to me.  My sister, mom and my two besties have been working so hard on it.  I feel guilty!  I don't feel like I deserve it but I am going to enjoy it anyway because Sawyer is definitely something to celebrate about.  I love my little monkey!

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

28 weeks - 3rd trimester!

How far along: 28 Weeks.  I cannot believe we are in the 3rd trimester!!  This is so awesome!

Size of baby: By now, your baby, who weighs in at about two and a half pounds and stands — or rather lies — at almost 16 inches (measured head to toe) has added blinking to his or her growing bag of tricks. (Outside in the real world, blinking is necessary to help keep foreign objects out of the eyes.) Other impressive new talents being added to your baby's roster in the womb include coughing, more intense sucking, and, perhaps most important, better breathing. Of course, it's still best if a baby doesn't check out of that uterine hotel just yet — there's still a lot of growing and maturing to do over the next 12 weeks.

Weight gain: 20 pounds.

Maternity clothes: Mostly.  I can still get away with a few of my regular shirts!

Gender: BOY!!

Movement: Yep! He's pretty active! I love every second!

Sleep: I sleep okay but I wake up feeling like I took a beating... my whole body hurts!  I am hoping it will improve because my awesome friend Kate bought me a pregnancy pillow!

Symptoms: Back pain, feet and hands swelling, heartburn, headaches, braxton hicks, and now an irritable uterus, but despite it all, I am happy and have no reason to complain!

Cravings: I eat anything and everything that is put in front of me.  I really need to stop that!

Best moment this week: We put together Sawyer's crib and we now have his car seat and stroller!  I cannot believe there is going to be  a little boy here soon!

What I am looking forward to:  My awesome sister, mom and two of my bestest friends are throwing me a baby shower this weekend. I can't believe I am actually having a baby shower.  I always hoped that some day I'd have a reason to have one but I don't think I ever believed it would happen.  I am such a lucky girl!

Friday, February 4, 2011


Even though we didn't get to actually see my cervix yesterday, Dr. S is confident that everything is going well.  He said it is still high and closed and although it's a little soft, he's not concerned.  He even said that if I feel okay about going two weeks between our next appointment he would be comfortable with that.  I have my appointments scheduled until the end of March anyway so I told him that if the weekend goes okay, without any problems, then I will cancel my appointment next week.  I mean, if I start having contractions or pains I know that all I have to do is call and they would get me in and check me.  So we'll see how things go.  Sawyer is growing well and Dr. S said he is very excited to meet Sawyer.  Although, we both agree that Sawyer is still a little doughy and needs to bake a little bit longer!  I can't believe that we only have 13 weeks left!  I am really going to miss being pregnant but I know I am going to LOVE cuddling my little buddy even more! 

Speaking of pregnancy.. (isn't that what this blog has been about the past few months?) I feel like I need to get some things off my chest (well there are two things that are not going anywhere, but I digress).  Looking back on the past few years, before and especially after Avery, I have recently come to the realization that I haven't been a very good friend.  So many of my amazing friends have welcome new little girls and boys into their families over the last few years and I feel that I haven't given them enough support or encouragement through it all.  I know that every time I would find out a friend was pregnant my heart would drop and it would feel like someone was punching me in the gut.  Now I know that anyone out there who has dealt with infertility or a loss, or especially both, knows exactly what I am talking about.  I know it's not just me who dreaded getting the good news from anyone I was friends with or even acquainted with.  But it wasn't that I wasn't happy for them.  I truly was.  It is just so hard to see everyone around you handed what you long for every second of every day.  It's really hard to explain and I am afraid that unless you've been there, you'll probably never understand.  Anyway... I would be happy for my friends from a distance because I was so scared that if I was around them and witnessing this amazing blessing that I was missing out on, my skin, nails, hair, pretty much everything, would turn green with envy and I would just fall apart.  Or that the happiness I felt for them would disappear and jealousy and anger would take it's place.  I was usually wrong, when I did happen to run into my beautifully, pregnant friend, instead of falling apart I would find that the happiness I felt for them was real and even though I felt incredibly sad at the same time, I wanted this blessing for them.  However, I never wanted to chance it because I never felt strong enough. 

So I know there are a lot of people out there that I may have offended or hurt with my behavior, and to you all, I am so very sorry from the bottom of my heart.  I never meant to hurt anyone. I do admit that I was mostly trying to protect myself and I realize how selfish that was.  Even now, I still have a hard time with it.  I think a lot of that has to do with that fact that although I am getting huge, and feeling Sawyer move every day; I still feel like this pregnancy isn't really happening and that any day it could all be taken away from me.  So I am happy to be pregnant, of course I am.  But I am also still very cautious about what I let myself feel or believe, and I am still very jealous of those beautiful, amazing, pregnant friends of mine who don't have the same fears that I do. 

I want you to know that I don't expect ANYONE to be happy for me.  I know that I don't deserve it, especially from a few of my friends out there.  I don't feel like I deserve this happiness  that I feel.  I feel guilty to be the one that is pregnant now, when there are so many out there who are still praying for their miracles.  I pray for you all the time and ask our Heavenly Father to allow you the same miraculous blessing that I was given.  My heart aches for those who have hearts aching for little bodies to hold and love. 

Well my chest doesn't feel any lighter (how could it with what ever DDD+DDD adds up to?) but I do feel better to have gotten that out.  I know it doesn't change anything but it's been eating away at me for months now. 

Until next week...

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

27 Weeks

How far along: 27 Weeks.

Size of baby: This week, your baby weighs almost 2 pounds (like a head of cauliflower) and is about 14 1/2 inches long with his legs extended. He's sleeping and waking at regular intervals, opening and closing his eyes, and perhaps even sucking his fingers. With more brain tissue developing, your baby's brain is very active now. While his lungs are still immature, they would be capable of functioning — with a lot of medical help — if he were to be born now.

Weight gain: 17 pounds.

Maternity clothes: Pants yes, sweats no, and I still think most maternity shirts make me look like I am wearing a tent but I have some really cute ones that don't so I mix those in with my regular shirts that still fit!

Gender: BOY!!

Movement: All the time! But I wonder... am I the only pregnant lady who freaks out if the baby doesn't move enough or moves a ton??  I guess I am always freaking out!

Sleep: The aches and pains of pregnancy are starting to kick in. I toss and turn most nights and don't feel rested in the morning but if I could I would sleep all day! I know it's only going to get worse but I am okay with that... as long as this little boy is growing and is healthy!

Symptoms: Back pain, feet and hands swelling, heartburn, headaches, braxton hicks, and now an irritable uterus, but despite it all, I am happy and have no reason to complain!

Cravings: Okay so I attempt to eat healthy but that usually means that I stick an apple or a salad into my daily pig-outs!  But I made my first Texas sheet cake this weekend and let me say I have been craving more ever since.  I may have to make another!  Also, can't wait for the Super Bowl and all the yummy food that comes along with it!  Bring on the party food!

Best moment this week: More and more people have been noticing the big belly and asking when I am due.  It's a huge relief for people to know that I am pregnant and not wonder if I am just gaining weight!  I was able to see a lot of extended family this weekend at my grandparent's 60th anniversary party and it was so nice to hear the "congratulations" and the "we are so happy for you" it brought tears to my eyes every time!  I feel so blessed!

What I am looking forward to: My sister and her little monster will be here this weekend!  I can hardly wait!  It is going to suck to not be able to play and wrestle around with Ayden but I can't wait to see him anyway! It's been too long!  He has gotten so big and is so smart, I am going to try to enjoy every second with them that I can!