After 4 months of hot flashes and night sweats I decided it was time to ask Dr. Sanders if there might be something wrong with me. He suggested a blood test to see what my hormone levels look like. He thinks there may be something wrong with my ovaries! It's only February and I am already having medical problems. I was hoping to at least make it to June or July without having to have any blood drawn. I also talked to Dr. S about my cycles, which have been regular over the past 3 months. That is the first time in my life that I have not had to take some sort of birth control or medication to have a regular cycle 2 or more months in a row. He sounded very optimistic and told me that I should start using the ovulation predictor tests to see if I am now able to ovulate. How great would it be if we didn't have to do IVF again? Nothing against Dr. D and his staff, but it would be nice to do it like most people do and maybe even have it be a surprise! I went out the next day and had my blood drawn then I went to the store, got my prenatal vitamins refilled and purchased a ovulation predictor kit. It won't do us much good this month with Skeet being away but I will be prepared next month!
I made the mistake of wandering past the nursery when I was at the hospital getting my blood drawn. There was a beautiful little baby girl in the window and for the first time since Avery was born I felt like I am ready to try for another baby. I knew that it was time. I am not sure I will be able to convince Skeet that it is time but in my heart I know that I am meant to be a mother and I shouldn't be putting it off. I miss my Avery, I wish so badly that I could see her everyday, hold her, hear her cry and smell her soft skin, but I can't. Not yet anyway. It was really hard to see that little baby girl in the window but I am glad I took the detour.
I saw Avery's headstone the other day, it hasn't been put in yet but I drove past the memorial office and saw it sitting out back. I knew it was Avery's because of the inscription I had put on the back. I wish the snow would stop and the ground would thaw so that we could have it put in. I will take pictures when it does finally go in so that I can share it with all of you.
I will let you know what I hear back about my blood tests. I am praying that he will tell me that everything is fine and my hormones are finally normal! The new job is going great! I really love it in this department and everyone has been really friendly and welcoming. I have made a decision about my future that I am very excited about, in about a year and a half I will be transferring to another school so that I can finish up in another field. Instead of Business Management I would like to do Radiology and specialize in ultrasounds/sonograms. I have a few general education classes to finish before I can be accepted into the program but I am so excited to get started. I feel like it is something that I can really enjoy doing and that I can possibly help others. What a great job, to be able to share in other people's happiness and also to be able to comfort and relate to those that get difficult news. After having had to work with some very cold people when we found out about Avery's condition, I know that I could make a difference to people in a situation like that.
Well I have written enough today. I will post news as I get it!